LONDON – CYCLISTS VS PUNKS

Cyclists are the weirdest subculture in London. They’re like skaters only really self-righteous and they all think that riding fast on a fixed-gear makes them Indiana Jones. Normally they hate on traffic cops and bendy buses, but now they’ve fixed their gaze on Dead Kids, an east London punk band. Which is odd.

It’s all about those Ghost Bikes that cyclists erect in the place where other riders have been knocked over and killed. About a week ago children’s bikes, sprayed white, with a sign saying “Dead Kids” on them started appearing on street corners. It didn’t take the cyclists long to figure out what they were about and the forums went ape-shit.

The two-wheelers got really angry at Dead Kids and went out and started defacing the “Dead Kids” bikes (we used to have some pictures which were above, but we got an angry email about it from the guy who posted them on some forum – I luv cyclists!), posted the singer’s email address on their forum and bothered the band’s PR so much that he got on the message board and distanced himself from it (which is some pretty shitty PR).

I rang Mike the singer from Dead Kids to see what he had to say. “I didn’t personally put them up, but if it makes people think then that’s our job as a band right?” he said. “I don’t like the Ghost Bikes anyway, I’d rather look out of the bus window and see something positive, like a sign saying – Here was the spot where John and Susan first met. They got married and had kids. I’m not into angry cyclists. I like lovers on country lanes cycling alongside each other holding hands. Now thats a beautiful image on earth and in heaven”.

Personally I think that those Ghost Bikes are a bit weird. I think the people who erect them could learn something from Horst Hoheisel‘s holocaust anti-memorials and stop involving themselves in these tragedies with such a weirdly cathartic ritual. Plus, the cyclists have got to chill out, they’re freaking out like Daily Mail readers over Princess Diana.

ALEX MILLER