Unbelievable Super-Athlete Bartolo Colon Runs Down Fool Trying to Steal a Base on Him

It will surprise no one to discover that VICE Sports is a militantly pro-Bartolo Colon shop, as we strongly believe in body positivity and oppose all forms of fat-shaming. It is with this spirit that we celebrate the splendor of watching Colon run down the incredibly foolish A.J. Pierzynski for a caught stealing. Seriously, watch our man step off the mount and be all I GOT THIS, FAM as he explodes towards Pierzynski who, frozen by the hypnotic power of a sprinting Bartolo, barely attempts any sort of escape before getting tagged for the out. Our dude didn’t even think about throwing the ball to a fielder.

As always, Bartolo had it all the way.

[H/T Erik Malinowski]