The noble Dick Van Dyke, who perhaps never heard of the Deed Poll

Before I changed it, my last name was Teat. So perhaps it’s a little hypocritical of me to make fun of people like Dick Long (who was friends with my ex), Michael Jackson (who worked at the supermarket by my parent’s house) Phil Collins (who went to my school), James Brown (who also went to my school and had never heard of the other James Brown) and Patrick Peepeepee-Patvong (who went to school with my boyfriend, though we don’t really know how to spell it). But, I did change it, so now, like the child-abused becoming the child-abuser, the vicious circle continues, and through the power of Facebook, I can make fun of whoever I want without fear of getting beaten up. Meet Randy Bumgardner…