OCEAN COMMOTION
Vice San Diego, CA Why the hell would you ask us? And even if we knew an answer, do you think people like us or you could do anything about it? Here’s a good stopgap solution: Accept the fact that we’re all fucked. OCEAN SHMOCEAN Vice Consumer Reports Phoenix, AZ Sorry, couldn’t hear any of your blah-blah-blah’ing because it feels so weird to be accused of being part of the liberal media. Vice hasn’t been lumped in with that whole rigmarole since forever. You just made our day, you crazy nut! UNIQUE VIEWS AND OPINIONS Vice Vice Via email So you’re going to hit Coachella, Hunter Thompson’s widow, and New Orleans all in one trip, huh? Didn’t you leave out Ground Zero, Jeffrey Dahmer’s grave, and the world’s biggest ball of twine? But really what you’re saying is that you want us to, first off, get you press credentials for Coachella (the answer is no—not only do we not know you, but also we don’t go to that circle jerk ourselves and have zero interest in covering it) and then help you pester Thompson’s widow so that you can do what exactly? Interrogate her because she isn’t honoring your pathetic hero’s legacy up to your liking? Here’s a better idea: Take your Hunter S. Thompson fixation and shove it so far up your ass that you choke on it. That guy is about as overrated as going to Coachella. JUST DESERTERS Vice Via email Hi. That article was intended as a forum for the resisters to tell their stories in their own words. If any of them were lying, which we doubt, the truth will come out at their refugee hearings. In the meantime, we’d be happy to see any documentation you think might interest us or refute their stories. Send stuff to editor@viceland.com. OK? Now please don’t call us yellow anymore. That’s just plain mean!