The pandemic has robbed us of the world's greatest singing show, so we're holding our own, including, but not limited to: Romanian trap, demonic Greek folk and OAP grime.
Here are some photos that show why hosting an international pop competition in a world-famous conflict zone can make things a little tricky.
Israel wants the competition to be a celebration of its values, while protesters are trying to stop the government from hijacking the narrative.
Artists like Lorde and Lauryn Hill have chosen not to perform in Israel in support of Palestinian human rights.
Prepare for some extremely gnarly camerawork, some lad called Michael representing the UK and at least one metal banger.
Israel is set to host the song contest against a backdrop of protests, boycotts and political propaganda.
And also generally what they all think of us at the moment, what with that whole Brexit thing.
“It is with regret that we will therefore immediately be terminating our partnership with the broadcaster."
Wait, if you take out the LGBTQ+ stuff, what’s left?
"Storm" by SuRie has been chosen as this year's Eurovision entry for Great Britain, but how well will it actually do? Maths, bitch.
Read it all here so you don't have to open Twitter.