Stop Drake from Crying in a New App Called 'Drizzy Tears'

Dry your eyes, Drake.
November 12, 2015, 11:25am

Have you ever caught yourself revisiting "Marvin's Room" and thinking, goddamn, that Drizzy needs to get his fucking shit together? At some point, anybody who has plugged themselves into Take Care has inadvertantly become the Kleenex for Aubrey to snot his problems in without the opportunity to say: "Dry your eyes, Drake" in extremely Mike Skinner voice. Now, we might finally have a solution.

Over the years Champagne Papi has been watering the rap game with his tears and now we can save him from his misery in a new literal rap game called Drizzy Tears - an app developed by Ashten "Whoopi" Winger, where the object is to stop Drake from crying "before it's TOO LATE!" (which is gamer code for: drunk dials an ex) by tapping his emotional droplets before they reach the bottom of the screen.

There's even a thorough soundtrack available on Soundcloud, which you can listen to below. Synergy!