Florida Stories
How I Learned Not to Eat Cakes Baked by Former Drug Kingpins
A story about Florida, marijuana, mistaken assumptions, and how I ended up trying to interview a jail inmate while high as balls.
How I Learned You Should Never Touch a Mysterious Ouija Board Someone Left on Your Porch
A story about superstition, axes, fear, fire, and a long night that could have ended in murder.
Why You Should Never Try to Hide a Runaway Florida Teen in Your Dorm Room
A story of young love, speed, punk rock festivals, low-level crime, and Gainesville.
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I Learned the Hard Way Not to Day-Drink with Strangers in the Florida Panhandle
I met a pair of cousins who dealt Oxy in Pensacola Beach at a bar called Crabs, and naturally I assumed they'd be my best friends.
How I Learned You Probably Shouldn't Try to Turn Raccoons into Pets
When a baby raccoon approached me, I imagined I had made a new friend, but things gradually took a turn for the weird.
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