This Extremely Fat Colorado Bear Is Lovingly Named ‘Durango Tubby’

Durango Tubby has got to be one of the most demeaning nicknames imaginable. Luckily, it’s been given to a creature that cannot comprehend how mean it is. Durango Tubby is a bear that’s been spotted near Durango, Colorado, and you can imagine, it’s a very fat bear.

Local wildlife officials took to Twitter/X to post newly captured images of Tubby. It doesn’t look so much like a bear as it does a big pillow with stubby little legs. Tubby is roaming around the Colorado countryside, eating everything it can as it prepares for hibernation. 

As you probably learned in elementary school, bears hibernate through the winter. To prepare for that, they enter a physiological phase known as hyperphagia, where they eat damn near anything in sight. They’ll eat up to 20,000 calories a day so they can build up the proper fat reserves to survive their harsh winter slumber when food will become scarce and the frigid temperatures make life nearly unlivable. So Tubby’s rapid weight gain isn’t a concern.

This isn’t a matter of a real-life bear being stricken with some kind of Yogi Bear personality disorder where it simply cannot stop stealing fatty foods. It’s living out its normal hibernation cycle—and apparently doing quite a good job at it. He must live near a bakery dumpster or something.

The Colorado Parks and Wildlife also posted some videos of Tubby waddling around that really provide proper context for just how massive this bear is right now. If this thing decides to go on a rampage, animal control better break out the bazookas because this thing is so big the tranquilizer darts and rifle bullets will probably ping off of it without doing any damage.

A local resident who goes by @SOULTSIE on Twitter/X dubbed the bear Durango Tubby after posting Ring camera footage of it passing through her yard in the dead of night. Watching the footage, it’s clear that it is, in fact, a real bear… but it could also be three guys in a hyper-real bear costume.

Durango Tubby doesn’t seem to pose any threat at this time, and wildlife officials don’t see the need to tranquilize it to study it for any reason. Can’t wait to see what he looks like when he wakes up in the spring. 

If you’re looking for more fat bear content, read all about Alaska’s Fat Bear Week contest, where every year, a live feed of Brooks River in Katmai National Park in Alaska captures footage of fat bears prepping for hibernation. Viewers are given the chance to vote to see which bear is best preparing for their upcoming slumber. Unfortunately, this year’s Fat Bear Week was delayed a little bit when one bear killed another one.