My buddy Bill Philip, who I spent many happy years dossing at art school with, has a website called

Fotos I’d Like to Fuck, it’s almost impossible to navigate but once you get the hang of it you’ll be rewarded with his somewhat bleak and impenetrable world view, brought to you via the mediums of photo, collage and video.

Bill has never owned a mobile phone, is engaged to be married, dresses impeccably, has a very specific remit of what music he is prepared to listen to (it’s something like September 1964 to March 1975) and has kept count of the amount of wanks he’s ever had in his life.

ROBERT THUMBS DOWNEY Jr