THE END OF BUYING

Downloading video, music and other media is a pain in the ass and by the time MASK (or a movie that’s still in theaters like Talladega Nights) is finally fully loaded on to your computer you have about 3k left to play it. What someone needs to invent is an independent, external hard drive that can download everything you could possibly think of and do it without bothering you until it’s ready. Wouldn’t that be awesome?
Well, it has been done on earth as it is in heaven.
And it is awesome.

The ASUS WL-700gE replaces everything in your house but the furniture (and food I guess). You don’t need to rent or buy movies, or CDs, or records or porn or anything like that ever again. Why even have a DVD player or a DVR or Tivo anymore? Ha ha advertisers. You’re obsolete. All you have to do is download everything on to this little white box, hook your computer up to some speakers, video adapter it to your TV if need be and you’re off. You have a CD / movie collection the size of Michael Jackson’s and it takes up about as much room as a little kid’s shoe.
The ASUS WL-700gE is essentially a combination of a wireless router/gateway and a media-downloading machine. The best part of this motherfucker is the fact that it comes with an embedded BitTorrent client and download manager. The torrent downloading system is like that infomercial “set it and forget it”; you queue up your downloads and let the client do its thing. Simply paste in the URL of the download you’re after, specify the appropriate protocol (HTTP, FTP or BT) and press Download. The best places to get video are here and here and music is best sucked out of here. While you sleep it’s downloading every episode of 60 Minutes that ever was, the entire Phil Spector anthology, and more lesbian orgy porn than any wanker could possibly handle. All incoming files are stored in the Download Folder and patiently await your attention.
The ASUS comes with a 160 GB built-in hard drive but this hard drive can be exchanged for a much larger 500 GB drive if you want to go on vacation or something. Your warranty will become void when you go up to the 500 but who cares? Soon you’ll have every thing in the world. If they allowed these things in prison going to jail would be a blast.
Are you getting this? No computers need to be running to keep the downloads active – the router handles all communication natively. It also has a built in network iTunes client, so it’ll show up as an iTunes client to your PCs.
That’s it. $260 to never spend money on eyes / ears – based things ever again. All you have to do is buy the unit from any major hardware retailer, plug it in via USB, install the software and you’re set. The installation wizards will take you through the setup process and the help files will solve any downloading issues you may have.