With a growing number of young people becoming more comfortable with the idea that the gender binary is outdated, it’s a good time to get educated on exactly how to use the right terms with your non-binary friends. Though terms like “androphilic,” “transmisogyny,” and “cisnormativity” might seem hard to parse, it doesn’t take much to brush up on what you need to know to be the best ally you can to those who don’t identify as male or female.

On this episode of How to Treat X, VICE sat down with Jay, who identifies as non-binary, to hear firsthand what it means to be gender fluid. They walked us through the basics, offering up a few tips on how to discuss gender fluidity and how to be a solid ally to those who reject the gender binary.