CORNERSHOP COCKTAILS – THE RECIPE
They may be the flamboyant, high-maintenance gay man of the alcohol world, but that doesn’t mean cocktails can’t be made for the common scumbag like you and I. So, with a bit of imagination and some non-kitchen ingredients, you can get crunk on cavity-inducing hooch, too.
Jambrini Royale
Videos by VICE
Ingredients
plop x strawberry jam
shot x vodka
lots x Lambrini
Step 1.
Dollop some jam into a champagne flute.
Step 2.
Swig in a shot of vodka to break up the jam.
Step 3.
Top up with your fizzy slag piss.
Step 4.
For a finishing touch, smear you rim with more jam.
Martini Puppy
Ingredients
lots x fresh pineapple
lots x Mad Dog 20/20
ice for crushing
even more vodka
Step 1.
Blend your pineapple in a, umm, blender.
Step 2.
Crush some ice and fill a martini glass.
Step 3.
Slop over pineapple sludge.
Step 4.
Finish by topping with vodka and Mad Dog.
Creme De Mouthwash
Ingredients
1 x bottle of vanilla milkshake
1 x capful of mint mouthwash
1 x bottle of WKD Blue
Step 1.
Pour vanilla milkshake into any old jar.
Step 2.
Add a capful… or shot of minty mouthwash.
Step 3.
Empty in your bottle of WKD.
Step 4.
Shake vigorously.
Step 5.
Put into a fancy glass.
Bottoms up to your trio of cornershop cocktails. Happy buttfucking, y’all!
Previously: Girl Eats Food – Olympic Energy Nachos
Really fucking hungry? Check out Joanna Fuertes-Knight’s (totally free) online cookbook! It’s got every Girl Eats Food recipe ever in it.
