Sing Along to These Love and Hate Songs About Vladimir Putin

This article originally appeared on VICE Romania

A lot has been said about Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin. Vova. The Czar. The USSR's James Bond. Leading armies across Chechnya, Georgia, Ukraine, and Syria. Prime minister, president, prime minister again, then president again.

He has released tigers into the wild, basically has his own biker gang, loves hunting and fishing—sometimes shirtless—has a black belt in judo, is an accomplished hockey player, and sings "Blueberry Hill" in public.

The naysayers argue that the only thing he leads is an enormous propaganda machine, that he doesn't care about human rights, plus that he is a mobster with a nuclear detonation button. What the naysayers forget is that beyond all the propaganda served up in his name, Putin is loved by many Russians—his approval rating is apparently in the high 80s—so deeply that he inspires artists. Artists like amateur musicians.

To explore the ways Vova Putin has influenced the Russian speaking music scene, we have chosen some of the best songs about Putin we could find—some positive, some critical—and translated parts of their lyrics.

Let's start off with a war tune. In the Open Field is a simple but effective video, showcasing the Russian army in action. It's also worth mentioning that the lyricist/composer, who was born in Moldova, is called Peleneagră—Romanian for Black Skin.

The song starts off like a power ballad, making you wonder if all those pictures of soldiers haven't been inserted there by accident. The singer mentions he looks at the stars in the sky, which remind him of fireworks, Lady Di's diamond necklace, and New York. Right as you're about to wonder what this guy has been smoking and where you might get your hands on it, he hits you with the chorus: "And in the open field, the Grad System / Behind us—Putin and Stalingrad." The Grad System is a platform that can launch 40 rockets in just 20 seconds. It's been used by the pro-Russian separatists in Ukraine.

It's also profound how the song links Putin, a self-professed fan of the USSR, with Stalingrad—the battle in which the Red Army overturned the course of the war against Nazi Germany.

Some bloggers have claimed that this song is actually a subtle jab of irony against Putin, but I doubt it is. Tajik crooner Tolibdjon Kurbanhanov's face is not the face of someone who jokes. And the lyrics are as honestly affectionate as they come:

Tolibdjon keeps it a lot more to the point in the chorus:

Mashani seems like a true country girl, standing in a field, decked out in the Russian flag, with one strand of hair braided with a red thread to ward off the evil-eye. While in that field, near a wall and in a basement, she's singing her little heart out about her dedication to Putin. In the basement she's wearing a Ukrainian flag, matching with some of the lyrics of the song, applauding the annexation of Crimea.

The English translation of the lyrics mostly about what a man's man Putin is—can be found in the YouTube clip, but I'd like to highlight the chorus:

I'm trying to make "That's so Putin" the new "That's so fetch." Believe me, it's going to happen.

Throughout the video, there are glimpses of a mysterious biker. Is Putin the biker's morning star, guiding him on his journey? Is the biker Putin? There's no telling. The video ends somewhat abruptly with Mashani looking into the distance, so we'll never know if she rides off into the sunset with Putin himself or with just some guy on a bike taking advantage of the situation.

Marina is a young girl, so no blame befalls her for the quality of this production. But the guy with the mustache behind her (father? Uncle? Grandfather? Neighbor? Music teacher?) could have mentored her better into giving a more subtle performance. Singing so loudly and closely into the camera is no ticket for getting into show business.

She does, however, get her message across: During the first three verses, she keeps repeating how great it would be if Putin goes to Crimea, and in the chorus she asks him to take the appropriate measures:

The song ends with a positively idyllic scene, with people rejoicing at having been freed from under the Ukrainian yoke:

This song by Poyushie Vmeste ("Those Who Sing Together"), was so on point that the girls made an English version:

Again, the song is about what a fine, desired gentleman the Russian president is: The girl in the song has dumped her drunken bully of a boyfriend, and now wants someone like Putin:

But not all songs about Putin are about the glory of his decisiveness, stable character, and moderate alcohol consumption. There are some hate hymns about him as well, so let's discuss a selection of those:

These burly blokes are veterans of the Russian Airborne Troops' special elite forces, also called "Desantniks." In the USSR, kids used to threaten each other by saying: "I'll tell on you to my cousin, who's a desantnik." The guys really dig into Vladimir Vladimirovici:

To be clear: these are the kind of guys you'd want on your side—or not against you, at least. Unless maybe you're someone like Putin. Then you might not care about it all too much.

It's not just angry guys on guitar who aren't fans of Putin—there's critical hip-hop, too. Like this one from a couple of years ago: Vasya Oblomov doesn't waste any time on introductions and goes all in right off the bat:

That last line, about "something bothering you" is Russian gang terminology. When a gang member is trying to take over a particular area, he tells the people in the area that the gang will take care of everything—against a protection tax, of course.

The lyrics in this video could have been taken from any of the songs in the former category, and sung by a bunch of fan girls. But it's not, at all. It's sarcastic rap!

There's really nothing sarcastic about this next song—these guys get right to the point: "Vova, Putin Vova is a Plague." The song also talks about the opposition, which isn't doing well in Russia. It's much safer to just sing Putin's praises:

Aside from this last one basically comparing Putin to the Black Death, it can be hard to tell with these songs which lyrics are pure adoration and which are pure sarcasm. That should be a worrying sign to a world leader that you might want to tone it down a little. Unless maybe you're a world leader like Putin. Then you probably don't give a shit.