If You Do This at Restaurants, Your Server Hates You

If you’ve ever asked your server for extra napkins, then another spoon, and maybe a lemon wedge right after that—congrats, you’ve committed one of the most annoying restaurant offenses, according to people who actually work in the industry.

It’s called one-timing. And while each individual request might seem harmless, restaurant workers say the habit throws off their rhythm and spikes their stress, especially during the dinner rush. “It really slows everything down,” said Stephanie S., a server in Utah, who told Reader’s Digest that she felt overwhelmed by needy tables when she was starting out.

The problem isn’t what you’re asking for. It’s how you’re doing it.

This Is the One Thing Restaurant Servers Wish You’d Stop Doing

Servers move fast and think in batches. They want to be as efficient as possible—grabbing utensils, drink refills, and condiments for multiple tables in one trip. But one-timing forces them to bounce back and forth, turning a single errand into five. “I’ll admit, it kind of makes me hate people if they do this at peak dinner rush,” Sarah S., a Florida-based server, told the New York Post. “It turns into a logistical nightmare.”

The habit might not be such a big deal when the restaurant is slow. But during high-volume hours, it’s the kind of thing that adds up fast. “To reduce these kinds of guest requests, I always try to anticipate needs—especially for big parties or families with little kids, who are the most likely to one-time me to death,” said Valerie P., a Washington server.

And no, this isn’t just the diner’s fault. According to April O., a server in Texas, one-timing happens when both sides fall short. “Customers forget to ask for everything they need and the server fails to anticipate their needs,” she said. In her view, good service and good dining etiquette go hand-in-hand.

So what can you do instead? Think ahead. Take a second before your server walks away to ask if anyone else at the table needs anything. Mention your extra sauce or side dish before they’ve walked halfway across the room. Small things make a big difference.

I used to wait tables, and I still have flashbacks of getting one-timed into oblivion. It’s not the requests themselves—it’s the timing. A few extra trips for lemons and ranch doesn’t just slow things down, it completely derails the flow.

And when you’re juggling ten tables on $2.13 an hour in some states? It feels like sabotage. Tips better be good.