If you’re present on social media, you’ve likely been a victim of societal pressures. Just a few minutes of scrolling on TikTok can trigger a variety of insecurities or perceived shortcomings, making you feel the need to invest in the latest and greatest products and procedures.

While many of us compare things like our appearance or careers to others’ online, some are even comparing their homes. Ah, yes—consumerism at its finest.

Now, if you’ve fallen into the downward spiral of believing you need more more more to feel secure in your life—or at home, in your own sacred space—you’re certainly not alone. Just the other night, I had to slowly exit out of my full digital cart of home decor before I made a financial decision I’d regret.

What is House Shaming?

House shaming occurs when a person feels ashamed of their own home or space simply because it doesn’t meet perceived societal standards. For example, you might see someone else’s perfectly curated home and then immediately feel inferior when looking at your bare living room.

Some people fall so victim to house shaming that they refuse to let others in their homes. This is a heartbreaking realization, considering many of us can barely even afford a rent or mortgage in this economy, much less pricy homemakers. Yet, we let it eat away at our ability to host or gather with loved ones.

But how, exactly, can we overcome this desire—which sometimes feels more like an emotional need—to perfectly decorate our space? How can we heal from “house shaming” and work with what we already have available to us?

Jamila Musayeva, author of “The Art of Entertaining at Home” and host of a lifestyle YouTube channel with over 1 million subscribers, spoke with the Associated Press about this prevalent issue—and how to address it. 

“A home doesn’t have to be perfect to be welcoming,” she said. “It simply has to feel cared for,” she told the outlet. “If you’re worried about how your space might be perceived, start by focusing on what you can control.”

“Think ahead about the rooms your guests will actually see,” she continued. “Give those areas some attention rather than overwhelming yourself with the whole house. A clean bathroom with a fresh hand towel, good lighting in the living room, and somewhere cozy to sit go much further than expensive décor.”

And remember: a home isn’t meant to impress. Rather, it exists as a form of safety, refuge, and comfort. By simply shifting your perspective and reframing how you view your space, you can cultivate a more welcoming, love-filled home for yourself and your loved ones.