Emma Frost has done things to my brain. I can’t resist her Marvel Rivals mommy domme vibes. The internet can’t, either. Everywhere I go, I see Frost. Discord? Frost. Bluesky? Frost. Twitter? Oh, you better believe there’s Frost. Whether I’m in a VTuber’s server or on a gooner’s Twitter page, I gaze upon her hypnotic eyes and thick thighs doing unspeakable things to others. And I have to admit… I don’t exactly mind it. I have a thing for blonde baddies that look like taller, curvier versions of myself. Hi, Mommy!

Oh, but NetEase isn’t finished with me yet. More lewdity is afoot. A new teaser from the official Marvel blog implies we’re about to get swimsuit skins for Marvel Rivals. So, get ready, my fellow gamers. I’m not sure if us gooners will hold back this time.

Get ready for swimsuits

Yesterday, Marvel teased new information on the upcoming Marvel Swimsuit Special reboot, slated for July. The relaunch of the ’90s fan favorite is intended as a free-for-all for artists, letting them pose Marvel’s greatest heroes in all sorts of sexy beach attire. Marvel Comics isn’t beating around the bush about its intentions with the new swimsuit edition, either. The phrase “reading it for the articles” comes up in the first four paragraphs.

That said, Marvel fans can expect an overarching story about various superheroes teaming up to do a swimwear shoot after the Wasp uncovers an unauthorized special flying around. Between the plot (which is really just an excuse to see Marvel heroes in speedos and bikinis) and “splash page after splash page of gorgeous art,” the “super-sized” release will likely prove popular with gooners, coomers, and other local perverts. You know, horny lesbians like myself.

However, it’s a throwaway tidbit that’s really gotten Marvel Rivals fans excited. See, in Marvel Comics’ blog post, the company teased that the swimsuit special “will also include designs for new costumes coming soon to Marvel Rivals.” What does that mean? We’re almost certainly getting summer swimsuit skins for everyone’s favorite hero shooter.

Now, we won’t know specifics for quite a bit of time. One could argue the skins will fall in line with some of the heroes seen in the July swimsuit special. Based on a teaser image shared by Marvel Comics, that means we could get a speedo for Iron Man, Black Widow in a tight red swimsuit, and Black Panther showing off his lean frame in some sleek briefs. But that’s the best inference we can make for now. The possibilities are endless, from Emma Frost in a bikini to Moon Knight pushing the limits of the term “swimwear.”

‘Marvel Rivals’ wants its female characters bare

No matter what, I expect NetEase to amplify the sex appeal with these new skins, especially for the game’s female characters. Frost’s curvaceous figure (and jiggly trailer) definitely reignited interest in Marvel Rivals this Spring, especially with the release of her incredibly revealing X-Revolution outfit. Frost, of course, continues a long-established tradition of Marvel characters looking particularly attractive in the game. Everyone remembers when Malice dropped, baring her belly and wiggling her plump rear. And who could forget Season 0’s Empress of the Cosmos skin for Hela, which offers plenty of tasteful sideboob?

“THE GOON HAUNTS YOU,” as one Redditor commented, to which another added: “MAXIMUM GOON.”

I expect Marvel Rivals to get similarly attractive swimwear attire when the summer skins drop later this year. Hopefully, that means some diversity in sexy attire. As I mentioned in my article on Emma Frost’s reveal, I’ve seen many female fans express disappointment in the game’s intense sexualization of women. And yes, I may be a lesbian pervert, but I’m also a feminist lesbian pervert. I don’t want to play Marvel Rivals just to watch women breast boobily while bouncing their buxom butts. If sex appeal is such a core part of this game, at least add a little something for the players who like boys. You know what I mean, NetEase. Give Spider-Man that nice, fat Spider-Bulge.

Nevertheless, we’ll have to wait a bit longer to see what NetEase has planned for the gooners among us. Let’s hope it’s an equal-opportunity perv fest.