‘Moves of the Diamond Hand’ Is Easily One of the Most Delightfully Weird, Surreal Dice-Based Games I’ve Ever Played (Preview)

Moves of the Diamond Hand caught me off-guard in a way few games do. Published and developed by Cosmo D, the bizarre title describes itself as a “jazz-noir mystery.” But that simple, unassuming “box” hides a game full of tense dice rolls, appropriately hideous and layered characters, and pizzas you can personally name. So, let’s take it from the top, shall we?

When I booted the game up, I found myself face-to-face with the ugliest main menu I’ve ever seen. The colors, the font — it’s an absolute eyesore to behold. Little did I know? I was tricked into the exact headspace Moves of the Diamond Hand wanted me in. I was prompted to choose a dice color, so I went with green, my favorite. Next, my faceless character sat on a subway lined with framed flowers and other vibrant pieces of art. I walked over to the only other person on the subway: Luke. Who I quickly learn is a former professor, now forced into a job where he oversees the maintenance of the subway.

‘moves of the diamond hand’ surprised me

As you can see, Moves of the Diamond Hand looks like a game fit to be the subject of a creepypasta about haunted video games. Luke, the surrounding subway, the world beyond the tracks — everything looks wrong. Luke’s a standup dude, it turns out. But, even during the introductory conversation, I couldn’t help but feel… unwelcome. As if whatever town I’d rolled into expressly wanted me out. Yet, I persisted.

Through Luke, I learned a few things. My name, our connection, the seedy past I chose for Tyrese Bonk (his whole name, yes), and my ambitions regarding “Circus X.” If you want to be someone in this world, Circus X is the fast track to your greatest desires. Choosing from one of the seven skills (Cooking, Deception, Music, Observation, Physique, Wisdom, and Wit), I decided Tyrese would use Circus X to fulfill his ambitions to be a part of the City Council.

Then, the game dropped the dice on me, and it was sheer insanity from there.

in which i try my best to explain how the dice system works

Okay. So, Moves of the Diamond Hand has a complex dice-based system upon which most of your actions and choices rely. For each of the aforementioned seven skills, you have six die faces: half starting at zero, half starting at one. During an action or conversation, your options correspond to a specific skill. Before you choose, the game explicitly tells you your opponent’s die faces, and you roll against one another for the highest number (or, in a tie, the game still grants you a Success). Your first priority will be upgrading your die faces ASAP.

So, if a skill’s die is set at 0-0-0-1-1-1, your best roll, barring some buffs, will always be 1. Which sucks. Even if you upgrade one of your 1 die faces to a 2, your odds of rolling that single 2? Poor. The game gives you plenty of opportunities to earn experience points so you can quickly upgrade your dice. If you’re the kind of player who doesn’t enjoy exhausting dialogue options, you’re going to hate this game. Moves of the Diamond Hand doesn’t make it necessary for you to burn through dialogue, but the game throws you experience points left and right for engaging with the setting and characters.

It’s a mystery game. If you aren’t here to give the narrative a chance, you’re in the wrong place.

oh, and then tyrese almost slipped on a puddle of spilled boba tea

After convincing Luke to give me the solution to the subway puzzle, I casually stepped off the subway. That’s when my suspicions of “This world actively hates you” were confirmed as I had to roll for Tyrese to not slip and bust his ass walking over a spilled puddle of boba tea. Fortunately, the game is nice enough to make the opposing roll a cakewalk. Plus, every successful or failed role will grant you temporary extra status effect dice that could either assist or ruin your next roll. Moves of the Diamond Hand works in mysterious ways.

Admittedly, I didn’t “get” the game during the first hour. The dice system was frustrating, the world felt dirty and uncompromising, and everyone and everything was just weird. Then, as I upgraded my dice and learned about specific characters and the overarching narrative, it clicked. Moves of the Diamond Hand quickly became one of the most unique games I’ve ever had the pleasure of playing. In the preview, everything worked in perfect harmony so I wasn’t grinding for money (which you can use to buy item dice and disguises that offer additional buffs/debuffs) or experience points.

many people won’t understand ‘moves of the diamond hand’s aura, but i do

I won’t talk much about the narrative because that aspect was a joy to slowly discover as the world and characters opened up. Instead, here’s a written Highlight Reel of the hijinks I got into:

• Met a group of aggressive pigeons I proceeded to ignore for a while because the dice rolls I needed to come close to beating them were insane.
• Learned nothing about the mysterious Circus X or the secretive Diamond Hand group. I did, however, learn how to make a pizza that gave me mental fortitude. (The pizza was named “The Gorger,” by the way.)
• Tried (and failed) to pickpocket the nearest person once Moves of the Diamond Hand told me I could.
• Played a song for some ingrates — but I made enough money in tips to buy out a vending machine full of good dice buffs!

The preview ultimately teased so many enticing possibilities in the full game. I didn’t know the greatness of Cosmo D before playing Moves of the Diamond Hand. Now? I need to treat myself to all of the team’s previous projects.